Brides Unite to Fight the Battle of the Bulge!

July 28, 2011

courtesy of angrytrainerfitness.com

With just under a dozen weddings rounding out the remainder of my 2011 calendar (you heard me), I’m constantly surrounded by all kinds of bridal chit chat.  And while the majority is light hearted conversations of flowers and colors and cakes and candy, there is another level – a not so pleasant level – that lurks in the background like a slow, rolling thunder…

My mother-in-law is crazy!  Our florist is the devil!  My mom’s driving me crazy!  Our caterer’s are out to get me!  You’re crazy!  I want to throw things at our DJ!  I’m crazy! (insert your maniacal nonsense here.)

You all know what I’m talking about.  But the biggest and most frequent “AHH!” to horns waggle its way into conversation… I’M NEVER GOING TO FIT INTO MY DRESS!!!

That’s right ladies… the inevitable fear of being too fat for the dress is an age old tradition of bridal banter that more than likely dates back to Medieval times.  If you’re anything like me, you’ve been endowed with many, wonderful things in your life.  But of all the wonderful things you have, you seem to be missing any sort of metabolic capabilities or even the slightest sliver of super model DNA.  And somehow, when these two things are missing, they can make everything else seem a little bit more lackluster.

Which is why each and every, single, gosh darn forsaken day, I feel like I have to work at my weight.  (Of course, I’m using the word “work” here interchangeably with “worry” (hehe), and yet, I digress.)  I feel like I’ve been dieting in some way, shape or form since I was 16, which basically means I’ve spent the last 11 years hungry.  Awesome.

And not only am I hungry, but I always seem to want super horrible foods at the most inconvenient times - for instance, during The Biggest Loser Finale, while perusing the latest issue of Victoria’s Secret or right before a bathing suit clad vacation.  Yet another dose of awesome. 

So, I’ve gathered over a decade’s worth of trial and error data to come up with a few tricks that have truly helped me along the way.  

1. Stressing over it will only make it worse.  (Probably why so many women cling to Yoga.) 
2. Everyone is different; so, don’t expect the same routines that worked for a friend to work for you.  Just kick booty at whatever you do!
3. No matter what a girl’s body type may be, she is liable to have just as many insecurities as you.  (Kind of nice to know we’re all in the same boat, isn’t it?) And finally…
4. Of all the fad diets, crash cut backs and insane techniques you can use to lose weight, nothing will EVER work better than good ‘ole fashioned healthy eating and daily exercise.

So, if you’re a bride currently looking to trim down, shape up or simply get healthy for your big day, here are a few sites I’ve found incredibly helpful: WebMD.com and LoseWeightLossDiet.com - pretty clever name, yes?  We’re all in this together, girls!  Brides-to-be, brides-already-been and brides-several-years-in: we’re all just as “ugh!” about weight loss as the next; so, get out, get going and rest assure that there’s at least one more person looking to take out her bathroom scale! Together, we can do this :)

Filed under: All About Me

Tags: battle of the bulge, bridal diets, bridal guide, diet, dieting, diets, fitting into a dress, fitting into a wedding dress, funny wedding stories, healthy living, losing weight, losing weight for a wedding, wedding, wedding blog, wedding blogs, wedding diets, wedding mishaps, wedding planning, wedding weight loss, weddings, weight loss